Jul 11th, 2003 by Anna

Dad’s timing is really weird. It seems when I’m at my heaviest (relatively speaking.. I’m talking about my heaviest now during maintenance), he comments on my weight loss and tells me I don’t need to lose anymore. At that point, I’m only trying to lose about five pounds, give or take, but that’s when he comments. Not when I’m at my lightest. Weird.

The other day, he commented again, but he brought it up in a different way than he usually does. He still said he didn’t think I needed to lose anymore weight and that he thought it would unhealthy if I did, but he asked when I was going to stop all this “nonsense” about counting points. That’s when I realized… he thinks this is a diet. He thinks it’s one of those things you do to lose weight and then you go right back the way you were. Like the grapefruit diet, or the soup diet… or whatever. He thought that I should be finished at some point. I explained that I was pretty well going to have to do this for life – gave him the whole WW spiel about a lifestyle change, not a diet. I didn’t feel like I felt semi-recently, where I felt all kinds of self pity about having to do this. I was okay with it. Then he said something even more curious… He said he wanted me to be “happy” and that skinny people are never happy. I reassured him that I was indeed “happy.” But isn’t that… silly? I mean, if fat people are so happy, why are they always trying to lose weight?

I’m happy with who I am, and where I am. I am focused on my weight more than the average jane, to be sure, but not to any real extremes. I hope Daddy is okay with it all now and doesn’t continue to worry…

Site Info.
Jul 11th, 2003 by Anna

Last Wednesday, the 2nd of July, the hosting company that served out my web site went belly up. I didn’t have any warning and wasn’t able to retrieve my mail (if you wrote to me and didn’t get a response, please resend – I answer all my weight loss mail). I’d also lost my journal (which is written online directly, not created on my hard drive first, like the rest of my site). I’d backed up through April, but that had me missing a lot of entries. Thanks to a new ‘net friend, I was able to retrieve all but the most recent two entries (and probably about five comments) since just before the snafoo. So I changed servers, uploaded all my main data, and set to the task of bring my journal back online. It took a great many hours, but my journal is back online… and I’m going to be sure to backup MUCH more frequently. Whew! Now back to your regularly scheduled weblogging about weight and food issues. :)

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